Eff it, I miss you

Saw u on someone's instagram today. Dammmnnn you were looking so damn good. and here I am, on bed, contemplating whether to exercise or not (i surely am gonna do my workout after seeing your photo) 

Lately ive been eating a lot. I have loads of reason why I should be losing weight and  eating healthy but I donno, sometimes im too stressed out that i figure I deserve that chocolate or anything else that is unhealthy.

anyway, im turning 30 this year, my cousin had once asked me if I ever felt scared about turning 30, i was kinda off guard with that question cause I honestly dont really care. Its just a number. but to ease her mind I just told her that I am a lil bit scared. Im always in this kinda situation where I had to lie to people on my feelings just so they dont think that im being poyo. So heres a few things that people are always asking me but I dont know how to answer it in an honest way:

1) on worklife
I may not have the highest paying job in the world but I can say I am one of the happiest person to be doing what I love to do. So please dont pity me. Ask yourself if you are happy with what u r doing.

2) on lovelife
Im so tired of people my age complaining about being single. I HONESTLY am fine with being thirty and single. If im not, i would have gone around looking for a spouse but I dont even try. I even find myself hard to like anyone rite now.I felt stupid for joining baitulmuslim. I am so okay with being single that it kinda scares me.

3) life
i dont like to share my problems, whatmore to share with someone who cannot fix it.I would normally keep them to myself and try and solve it silently.Especially when it involves a certain someone.Maybe cause I know that I myself is not perfect and probably is a problem to someone else too.

ive been developing a single life habit too. Animes on cinemas, Tekken at the arcade, long train rides just to observe people and many others. Probably being alone is a dangerous thing. Once you've feel the beauty of it, u might not want get away from it.

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